The following Email was sent to Former President Bill Clinton, 03/15/03.

Dear Bubba:

How's my favorite Triple Ex President doing today, huh? 

I saw you on TV a couple of weeks ago, and I don't remember the exact occasion but you were on stage before of some group sympathetic to your point of view.  You were commenting on President Bush's proposed tax cuts and you were pointing to yourself saying, "The President wants to give a tax cut to meee?"  Slight laughter from the audience.  "Wants to give a tax cut to meee?"  After hearing that I wondered, when you get that tax cut, are you going to say 'thank you'?

What?  You won't?  Aw, that's gratitude for you.  So I'll tell you what.  If I ever get to be President, I'll give everybody a big tax cut except you, how's that?  I'll make sure the legislation has a line at the bottom saying, "Everyone gets a big tax cut except Bill 'cause he won't appreciate it."  If fact if it'll make you happy I'll keep taxing you personally until all you have left to wear is a barrel with straps.  That way, whenever you stand in front of a sympathetic crowd, you won't suffer from an embarrassment of riches.

(And nobody says you can't over pay your taxes.  Go ahead.  Knock yourself out.  No more two-dollar deductions for boxer shorts donated to the Salvation Army though).

*Sigh*.  Here is what I find true about you leftist Marxist deconstructionist types - you have no concept of value.  You know money.  In fact leftists make fetish of it.  I remember one-time years ago I'm at this lunch counter chatting with some older lady.  The movie 'Jurassic Park' had just come out and stories were in the papers about how that there Steven Spielberg stood to make a bundle.  Rather than take a standard fee, Spielberg would take a percentage of the gross and if his movie did well, he'd do well. 

So this woman says to me, "I don't think anybody should be allowed to have that much money."

I said, "You sound like a socialist."

She said, "That's because I am."

My question then is: "Why shouldn't Mr. Spielberg or anybody be allowed to make that much money?'  In a global market, that's Mr. Spielberg's share.  It's a reflection of his value.  If Mel Gibson can get say eleven million bucks for a picture, that's the amount of value he adds to a project.  If it were his slice of the pie he'd be a damn fool not to take it.    

What you and the Marxists don't grasp is this - money is simply one way to keep track of value.  Value could be pile of cash; or it could also be a shelf of books; or a child growing up well; or philanthropy; or a group of good friends; or Ted Turner sponsoring the type of movie he wants to see.  It could be any number of things, anything you could call legacy. 

I have this mathematical relationship I apply to Marxists.  So as an individual travels further to the left, their understanding of value shrinks in a direct proportion.  Go far enough left and your holding hands with ethicists like Joe Stalin or Mao.  

As opposed to what people like Stalin, Mao, and Hillary are about, here's what America is about.  In this country a citizen finds himself in an environment where if he works hard enough, and is smart enough, then said citizen gets the opportunity to generate more value than any other citizen in any other country in the history of civilization.  This is our gift to the world.  When The President proposes a tax cut, he's trying to return value to the private sector where people know best how to apply it.  You'll see value transformed into different types of value, even the miracle of value created.  President Bush is trying to return value back to you, Bill.  What are your supporters laughing at?

I read the Newsweek cover piece about you in retirement some time ago, and in the article was this story where you're at this cocktail party and you say, "It's a shame I pay more in taxes than that bartender makes in a whole year."  Now I can understand why people at a party might not wish to contradict you.  You're an ex-president and there's a Secret Service guy over there with a bulge in his jacket.  But I wondered what would happen if somebody walked up to you and said, "Mr. President ... really?  Why is that a shame?"  (Probably not get invited to any more cocktail parties.)  Yet when I look at the statement, "It's a shame," I say, "That's an absurdity", because you're not just comparing apples and oranges, your comparing ex-Presidents with bartenders.

Now I'm assuming this bartender was a young guy and just starting out.  But even if he wasn't, he couldn't lay claim to the same degree of value belonging to you, first Democratic President to serve two full terms since FDR, an ex Pres who can command hefty speakers fee's, who was offered a gig on 'Sixty Minutes' with Bob Dole.  This reflects your value, your legacy, what is unique to you.

I'm a big believer in value and let me tell you this - if I had my way, I'd  write a Constitutional amendment saying only 24 cents on every dollar made in America or by an American can be taken out in tax - Federal, State and Local - and that's it.  I'd also put a cap on licensing fees so municipalities can't do an end run around this.  And I'd even outlaw licensing boards.  I'd call it 'The Heaven on Earth' amendment. 

If some politician came up to me crying he needed more money, I'd put my hands in front of my face and while like I was pulling taffy I'd say, "Why don't you stretch them little ol' tax dollars as far as you can.  Use your imagination."  Actually value creating more value in private culture would, over all, generate the Big Tax Revenues you'd need to pay for everything, like Hillary's version of Socialized Medicine.  There would be so much money avaiable with these record revenues, Senator Byrd would still be able find the funds necessary to build Railroad stations in ghost towns and stick his name on all of them.  Bill, can I count on you?

This would put a stop to what's coming next.  Socialism, Leninism, Stalinism, Maoism, Communism, Hillaryism - you and me, buddy, we got to draw the line against any philosophy that sucks value out of the private culture, against any philosophy that takes the legacy away from The Individual and turns it over to The State (and Statists like George Lucas.)  If we don't draw that line, we'll end up retelling that joke from the old Soviet days: "We pretend to work, they pretend to pay us." 

In the book 'Hell To Pay', if author Barbara Olsen is to be believed, that's what 'You Know Who' has in store for us.  It'll be a disaster.  Marxism?  If it's the natural state of humanity then why do Marxist governments need 'reeducation camps'?  I haven't been able to figure that one out yet.

Hell to pay, Bill.  There'll be hell to pay.  Like I said before: turn State's Evidence, cut a deal, throw yourself on the mercy of The Court.  Maybe we can get you into the Witness Protection Program before it's too late, before The Dragon Lady decides you know too much and feeds you to one them raptors from 'Jurassic Park'. 

Bubba, would I lie to you?

Your partner in crime, 

Alex